By Jena Griffiths | December 7, 2011
Last night I interviewed Lori Latimer on how to survive the festive season alone or when your children are with your ex. How to juggle family commitments so that everyone wins and also, so you’re aren’t left feeling sorry for yourself.
Lori made some good suggestions such as offer your services at a local shelter or other institution, or invite other single friends to join you or treat yourself to a wellness.
We also discussed the importance of focusing on all the things you have rather than what you don’t have, such as the happiness and health of your children. As one door closes others open. There is always a seed of an opportunity in every crisis but you need to be open and not focused on your own misery to see them.
We discussed the need to get out there and meet new people.
Every city has clubs of like-minded people, women’s groups or business groups or philosophy clubs. For example, in Zürich there’s ZIWA (the Zürich International Women’s Association), the American Women’s Club, the Asian Ladies Club of Switzerland, Professional Women’s Group of Zurich, Toastmasters and many more. You simply have to take the first step: get out there until you find a group that you resonate with; your adopted tribe or family. Here are the links to a many different groups for women complied by Xpat Xchange. There’ll be similar groups wherever you are in the world.
Also it helps to look at your ex or original family from a higher perspective (eg through the lens of your fingerprints). This helps you to re-frame the past and look for how this is serving you in some way. In other words, adopt the perspective that this is a supportive universe. One way or another, your ex or original family are your noble friends. How so? This perspective allows you to be far gentler on both yourself and others. I find knowing what your fingerprints say really helps. (You can figure this out yourself inside Earth School.)